So I am back on the roller coaster today, I have been doing pretty good the past couple of weeks. I hate when I get like this because I feel like I am driving people crazy. I feel like everyone hates me and all I want to do is cry. I am thinking it could be because I took a big step today and confronted something that has been really bothering me and I am just scared of the outcome. I am not really good at standing up for my self, I can defend someone else until I am blue in the face but when it comes to me I just bitch about it and never really do anything about it and well today I finely decided to do something. I hate feeling like all I do is wrong or that I am not good enough. Part of me regrets confronting the issue because I don't want to start drama or feel worse then I already do, but then the other part of me is like it had to be done because Im sick of fighting with people in my head ( yes I fight with people in my head) I know that is not very healthy but It makes me feel better because I am able to get out what I am really feeling and the people say what I want them to say, I know it is crazy!!
I just hope everything works out and that I didn't start drama...
Okay, I just have to go ahead and comment here. Heather, I don't know you that well outside of high school, and yes, I know things change and people change, but when I knew you well enough, you were one of the STRONGEST people in our circle. And from what I saw, you always stood up for yourself and others. You are an amazing person and I hope that whatever is going on, will soon work itself out and you can go back to believing that about yourself as well. Just hang in there. ;)
ReplyDeleteHeather, sometimes I feel exactly like you described it in this post. Sometimes I don't wanna cause problems with MY problems and most of the time I give up and try to be quiet and peaceful, even though I'm really sad or not understood. But sometimes we have to stand up and be proud of what we are and be more self-confident, do what we love with no fear, trusting our souls, and let them people think what they want, we're just us! I am what I am, and day by day I'm learning to drive my way. thanks to caring friends and my love Andrea. Just take you time, relax and let them love you as you are. :)
ReplyDelete