SO SO...

So still no computer, so I'm using my hubby's phone. Things have been so so, I don't have any time to do anything else , I never see Thomas, I work on his days off. I never see my bestie either. I am thankful for my job but now I have no life. I have been trying to stay up beat, I have been reading my bible every night and that really has been helping. But when I'm alone I just feel like I'm drowning in my thoughts. I don't have enough money or time and I guess it getting to me. Feel like I'm missing out from my loved ones lives since I barley get to talk or see them. I hate it!! I guess that's life...

Fast update...

So my computer is still down, so here is fast update

1. Vegas with my girls was beyond fun!!! Cant wait to go again!!!

2. I found a job!!! I work at Children's New world it is a daycare and the plus side Elijah is free!!!!

3. Thomas had to have surgery and he has been down but he has to go back to work on Monday, praying he finds something new soon!

4. Had a great birthday My bestie got me Tyler Perry Tickets and I am so freaking happy! and also a new kitchen table (:

5. Going to the Dr. on the 30Th and see what we can do about me having another baby. also I am considering having the lab-band done so going to talk to her about that as well.

So that is pretty much what has been going the fast version!!!

No connection...

Hey I just wanted to drop a quick note, I am wont be on for a while my computer is down and so who knows when I can get back on, I am the besties right now. So I hope everyone has a great rest of the week and I pray I get my computer fixed soon!!!!

LATE... (again)

Well I have not started yet, I am 2 weeks late I was suppose to start between the 12Th-14Th and I haven't yet. I want to go buy a test but I was 8 weeks late one time and I drove Thomas crazy with my test taking. I really hate this I just wish I was a normal girl and started at the same time of the month every month, so I don't have to sit here wondering.
I want to take a test to ease my mind but on the other hand I really don't want to see "Not Pregnant" on that stupid pink stick. What going to happen is I am going to start as soon as I get on the plan for Vegas! That would suck so bad!!!!
Think I will wait one more week and then maybe take one. Who knows maybe this pink little stick will say " Pregnant " I doubt but who knows....

Job Search...

Well Thomas OT job ended yesterday, so I have to find a job soon. I have roughly a month because then the traffic grant ends at the police department. I really hate job interviews I always seem to say to much or not the right thing. So I have been looking on line and I hope I can find something soon, and hopefully it pays more then my last job did LOL!! When I get back from Vegas I am going to go to the college and see what I need to do to get started. I am feeling a little better about my decision on going back to school. I am hoping I can figure out what will work for me. I am just praying and going to put it in Gods hands and let him lead me the way I need to go.

I wish...

Right now I am just lost beyond words. I am angry with my self and disappointed in my self. As a teen I was always in trouble for whatever reason and I wish I could go back and change a few things or more then a few things and I wish I could change things from last year. Here is my wish list... Things I wish have done...

1. Tried harder in school, a lot of my teachers didn't believe in me so i believed them and just slide by in school.

2. Listen to my parents and did what I was told instead of fighting them all my life, I would have been able to enjoy being a teenager instead of always being grounded.

3. Spoke up in class, I knew a lot what the teacher was talking about but I was too scared that I was going to sound stupid so I would always let another student answer.

4. Put my self out there. Til this day I am scared to take that jump and trust that God will lead me the right way.

5. wish I had found my love of history before now.

6. Wish I had stuck with diets and exercise when I was younger maybe if I had then the scale wouldn't cry every time i get on, Oh wait it not the scale it me!!

7. Wish I had a wedding. Now I know a wedding doesn't make the marriage and I don't regret getting married at the court house but I want to see his face when I walk towards him looking my best.

8. Read my bible more, something i can fix now.

9. wish I had decided to go to school before now. It going to be hard now with a child and a job.

10. wish I could stop making excuses for why I cant do things that will better my self for me and my family.

2 weeks and 5 days!

I am soooo excited for August to get here!!! I am going Vegas for the first time with my two besties and I just can not wait!!! We always try and plan trips together but it never fails that something always fall threw, hubby cant get off work, kids get sick, broke, broke is usually the main one. But in 2 weeks and 5 days we will be on a plan to Sin City! My husband keeps teasing me that we are not going to go to Vegas and do the things we should do instead we are going to hit the pool ( WITH OUT KIDS), Go to some muesumes and shopping. Just have some much need girl time!