I want to be...

I want to be beautiful,gorgeous,breath taking and sexy. Is that to much to ask for?? I don't think so!
  Last night I was laying next to Hubby who was in a deep sleep and I was just in aw of him. He has gotten better looking with age. He has a perfect nose and his lips mm mm and if you know me you know what I am thinking! He has lost some hair but he shaves his head so you wouldn't know . He has grown out a beard and it just make him look better and there is a bit of grey in it ( which he doesn't believe) but I find it sexy because it just shows we are growing older together.  When we first met he was a little heavy and wore this big glasses and he was quite. Then he met me, this crazy loud girl who offered him her piece of pizza that she didn't want ( true story) He looked at me like I was crazy. It took over a year for us to get together but we were friends in the mean time.
  Anyways I always dated bigger guys because well not very many " buff" guys would even give a second look. I was this short, heavy set girl with big boobs and a big mouth to match and not very many guys like how I how spoke  my mind Till Hubby. I had some confidence, and I like how I looked to a point and I wasn't mean to my self, but now I look at my self and I truly cant stand what I see. I have more stretch marks then a road map, my boobs are saggy and my milk will not dry up and lets not even talk about my ass.
   Almost 10 years later I am married to a very sexy fit man who has the love of working out the blessing of dropping weight with no problem he gets better looking while I just become soft and saggy. He has no idea how good looking he is, he gets hit on ALL THE TIME!!! Thank goodness he doesn't notice.
    I am back on Weight Watchers and I am at the gym 6 days a week and I am tanning ( in hopes to hide some of the stretch marks). I have lost only oh 6 pounds in a month, which I am not very happy about. I have so many things I want to do with him and the kids but I cant till I lose this weight. I want to go to Vegas and go backpacking and do a Zip Line and maybe sky dive. I want to learn how to scuba dive and the list goes on and on. I want our life full of fun!!
  I just want to be beautiful for my self and for him. He doesn't get that there are times he walks in and I cant breath because he looks so sexy and the way he holds him self now. He has come a ways since the first time I met him. No wander he gets hit on.
  I just feel beautiful, gorgeous,breath taking and sexy. I  want to stop him in his tracks like he does me, I want to catch him staring at me or cant keep his hands off of  me. I want him in aw of me...