Going Fast...

This pregnancy has gone by faster than I thought it would, I found out pretty early so I thought I would be pregnant forever! Yeah I was wrong!!!
Monday I will be 28 weeks and I will be entering my third trimester according to my What to Expect book. It just seems like yesterday hubby and I were talking about how we have plenty of time and now we are down to 3 months! To be honest with you I am freaking out!! I haven’t even bought her a single thing; I will pick up something at the store I think oh I have time to get her something. .. Now we are almost here and I still haven’t bought her anything! By this time with Elijah I had so many outfits and toys for him!
I am feeling more pregnant now, my belly is getting bigger and it is getting hard to breathe because Ms. Piper loves my ribs! She moves a lot at night and she moves with ever Thomas talks to her. She loves to stretch out and do a little dance on my bladder. I can’t wait to see what she looks like, Elijah had dark hair like me and big lips like Thomas so I can’t help but wonder if she is going to look like Elijah or completely different! I see a curly haired little girl but other than that I have no idea. We go in on Tuesday for another ultrasound and I am excited to see her again and this time Thomas gets to go with me!!
I went and bought some new maternity clothes and they are super cute, I just wish it was this easy to find cute things when I am not pregnant LoL!
We have so much to do before she gets here. We have to move things around in the house and deep clean it since we have a black lab who just loves to leave her hair EVERYWHERE!! Tomorrow my mother and bestie and I are going to go register at Babies R US and maybe target! I am excited to get that done with my two favorite ladies!!! We are going to start planning the baby shower and all that fun stuff! We are having a Halloween themed one! I cannot wait for our baby shower, Elijah’s was so much fun and I am looking forward to celebrating with all our family and friends. We are incredibility blessed and I couldn’t thank God enough for all the wonderful people he has put in our life and I can’t wait till Piper gets to meet all of them!!

Sick...

Headache? Check
Sore Throat? Check
Stuffy/Runny Nose? Check

Yep I am sick!! I hate being sick and pregnant because it a double hit! You can’t really take anything and you already tired from being pregnant so let’s add everything on top of that you just have no energy! I have been in bed all day with a box of Lotion tissues and Tylenol! I am praying that it doesn’t turn into strep because (knock on wood) I haven’t gotten it since I found out I was pregnant. I hope this clears up fast because I have a great weekend planned!
On an update, I passed my three hour glucose test!!!!

Elijah went to the fair today with my parents and that was great because I was able to get some rest and he got to have fun! Thank you mom and dad for being awesome!
Now I am going to take more cold medicine (it is safe) and watch Bridesmaids!
Goodnight…

Pregnancy Update…

I went to the Dr. the other day and everything is looking much better. My blood pressure is under control with my medication and my weight is good. However I had to do the glucose test. You know the really gross drink and you have to sit for a hr., yep that one! Well my Dr. called and I FAILED that test!! So what did I do today?? I had to do another test but this time I had to wait for three hours! I sat there in this small office while people came and went. I had my blood drawn every hr. I am praying that I pass this test because if I don’t, it means I have diabetes. I am trying not to freak out about this but I am!!
I should find out on Monday or Tuesday! I know a few women who had diabetes while they were pregnant and they said you just have to watch what you eat. It would make sense if I did because I still get horrible headaches and blurred vision even with my blood pressure controlled.
I go back to the high risk Dr. on September 26th and I can’t wait to see my baby girl again! This time my hubby gets to go with me!!
So please pray for me that my test comes back better this time!!

True Love...

his pledge to her: "i will kill the spiders. i will share my fries with you when you’ve finished all yours and are still hungry. i won’t ever pop my collar. i will never be rude to your tummy- when i hear it growl and gurgle, i promise to bend down and reply respectfully. i will eat the mushrooms when we order the supreme pizza. i will kiss the papercuts. and the door-slammed finger. and the counter-bumped hip. i’ll try my hardest not to get annoyed when you whisper questions and comments during movies. i will be the big spoon. i will let you win at wrestling. sometimes. other times i will not. i will go faster. harder. i will pull when you want. and tease you when you don’t. i will send you random txts and leave you silly gifts. not always. not on schedule. just whenever i want to. whenever i think you need one. or seven. i will check your tire pressure. and remind you to take your car in. i will hold your hand. i will love you. i will love you. i will love you."

Doubt ...

I have been full of doubt for the past few weeks and I am really not sure why.
I question everything in my head when someone says something. However it has been so much worse when it has come to my husband. I doubt everything he is saying to me. I just sit there and wander what he is telling me is true.
The thing is I have always had doubts about things, it like everyone else has their shadow’s to follow them but I have doubt. It always there, just whispering things to me. “He really doesn’t love you, who would love someone like you" I am getting that one a lot and it is eating away at me.
I don’t know what to do? I am getting to the point that I do not believe a word from my husband and it is causing fights and hurt feelings. I have always wondered why he was with me. I am short and overweight. I just don’t know what he sees in me. I feel people are looking at us and asking why is he with her.
I know this is not normal. I should be happy he loves me and that he is with me but it honestly hard to be, because doubt is there standing there reminding me how I look or how I am. I was hoping when I got married and had kids that I would have more confidantes but I don’t. I feel like I am back in school and I hear the kids calling me names and reminding me that I am short and fat...
I just don’t know what to do anymore; I do know that I can’t keep this up because I am pushing a wonderful man away and I so very much love him...

So if you could please pray for me that God shows me that doubt is just the devils way of controlling me...

Lost....

Don't you hate when you lose something and you have no idea when or where you lost the item?
That is what happen to me yesterday. I have a thumb ring that I have been wearing on my thumb for 7 years now and I never take it off! Well I was driving to dinner and I went to go mess with it like I always do, when I noticed that it was GONE!! I freaked!!! I looked on my self, floor, Elijah car set and I couldn't find. I have no idea where it went.
Now I know that some are thinking just go get a a new thumb ring, well that the problem the ring was my first wedding ring from Thomas. We got married at 19 and we had no money so we both had simple silver bands. When he " upgraded" our rings a few months later I put the silver band on my thumb.
I kept it on to remind me every day how far we have came in our life together...
I will keep looking and praying it will show up somewhere. I know I don't need the ring but I like having the reminder how blessed and loved I am by my husband...

Trying to change...

This weekend didn't go as plan and part of is my fault because if things don't go my way then I can be a totally you know what! I wanted this and that and I didn't get it and so I put on my silent treatment towards hubby and then the Witch came out.
As the day went on I started to thinking about everything that happened, I realized I am trying change my husband into something he isn't, I fell in love with him and I married him and he is the same person he was 9 years ago, so why I am trying to change him.
I see other couples and what kind of relationship they have and I judge my husband for not doing what that other husband is doing, which is hurtful and wrong.I have a great husband, I may not get flowers or cards but he really does give me so much more,I just need to realize what is important. He is a good man, he has an amazing heart and he loves me for just me! I am a big girl and he finds me beautiful and sexy ( even though i don't believe him). He is an amazing father and he thrives to take care of us. I know he loves me and 7 years later I just don't understand why he is even with me! I don't know how I got so blessed, instead of trying to change him I need remind my self everything he does for me and our family.
We may fight and we bicker at each other but we have a great relationship and we have a strong love for each other.
I realize I dont want him to change because he is the man that God made for me...